Embarrassing admission #2

I celebrated my 30th last week and my wonderful cousin got me the most glorious gluten-free cake. I mean, AMAZING.

Anyway, for days after we slowly chipped away at the cake and accompanying cupcakes and finally got down to the last slab. I couldn’t stomach any more butter and sugar so I told my partner he could have the last bit. Which he devoured without haste.

The cake had sickly-sweet, thick creamy icing on top so when he got down down to the last scoop he asked me if I minded if the dog lick the plate as he was done and couldn’t eat any more.

‘Aye, go ahead’ I say, not paying attention, carrying on with whatever I was doing.  ‘Hang on… wait!! Did you take out the candle holder?’ I swing around in panic, remembering the small blue bit of plastic that had been embedded deep in the icing. I never took it out because I didn’t want to stick my fingers in it and destroy the design.

‘What candle holder?!’ He replies, getting a bit panicked too.

‘The fecking cake had a candle holder in the icing… did you eat it?! Oh my God… the dog must have ate it!!! What are we going to do?!’ I flap in a real tizz. ‘The dog… she’ll DIE!!!’

‘What about me?!’ He flaps too. ‘I probably ate it!!’

‘Never mind you… what about the DOG?!!!!’

So either my partner or my dog has ingested it. And neither of us can figure out who it was. For days I’ve monitored my dog for weird behaviour and inspected her sh*ts but so far… nothing.

I cannot say I extended the same hand to my partner. I’ll leave his inspections to him.

I told a co-worker about my situation to which she heartily laughed and thought was hilarious.

I have yet to see the funny side!!




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